The smell of comfort

I’ve been sick at home all week, only tallying up a day and a half at school. It’s barely the end of summer, not even autumn yet, and already I have this awful sinus infection that makes me nauseous, my head heavy and dizzy, and has given me the most disgusting gunk at the back of my nose and throat – I just want to spit it out, but oh it’s just there… I’ll spare the gory details.

So sitting around at home hasn’t been really productive. I’d tried to read my American history and economic tetbooks – the pages that my friends have tried to get me to catch up on, but to no avail. When I’m sick like this, nothing works. I couldn’t even handle skim-reading the newspaper – somehow I read the same line 5 times without it registering, and completely gave up. My sole comfort so far has been watching old episodes of ER and Sex and the City online; and today I vamped this place up with a new theme. The header features a photoshopped image of layers of photos from over the summer, it’s not very exciting, but I was just so sick of seeing the old theme. In addition to all this crap, I can’t seem to stop stirring up problems with the boy. I have a short temper, an inability to express how I feel other than the negative, and me being completely burnt out just does not help, especially when he goes to a different school and I’m always preoccupied. But oh, I don’t know, it’s all a mess in my head, I just want it all to be okay. He came around for a while earlier today. Then for about two minutes after dinner. And despite all the shit that I put the both of us through, when I hug him, the smell of him is like the smell of comfort to me. It’s nice. And in those moments I feel safe.


  1. Chelley February 26, 2009

    I feel your pain with the sinuses. I have the same damn problem.. ugh. I’ve been sniffling, coughing and sneezing all damn day and I absolutely hate it. I hate this drastic weather change. :evil:

  2. Katy February 26, 2009

    I want to start watching ER too because it’s on right after Grey’s Anatomy! How many seasons are there?

  3. Amanda February 26, 2009

    @Katy – I’m not sure… like 15?

  4. Maggie February 26, 2009

    Awwww.. that is so cute! _>

    Hope you get better soon!! =)

    And, for a second there, I thought you were at uni but… no, last year?

  5. Amanda February 27, 2009

    @Maggie – I wish I was at uni! Most of my friends are, but eckk, 7th form :(

  6. Felisa February 27, 2009

    I am kinda sorta obsessed with smelling people. lol. Especially the people I care about… When I’m about freak out about stuff, if they hug me and I smell them, I just melt. It’s a wonderful feeling, isn’t it?

    Anyway, I hope you’ll feel better soon. And if you ever need to talk to anyone about American History — I’m a history nerd! :mrgreen:

  7. Chans February 27, 2009

    Ooh I hope you feel better soon! It’s always horrible to be at home sick, the first few days are OK, but after that sitting at home is just boring and when you feel miserable because you’re ill it’s even worse!

    Try to eat honey for your throat, it will make it feel a little less painful :)

  8. Dakota Dakota Dakota! February 27, 2009

    Hey ! Long time no see see!

    I hope you feel better soon… I KNOW the feeling of sinus, it’s so so so awful. Lots of fluid and honey and green tea will soothe your throat. Hope you get well soon sweets. *smiles*

    p.s I really like your new design, your header is really… unique. Very nice. And, I am all for vintage cameras!

  9. Maria February 27, 2009

    I hope you feel better soon! I had a similar cold last week… it was the worst. Sore throats and congested noses is all winter stuff. When will spring come?! Hahaha

    I also watched reruns of my favorite shows when I’m sick too lol They never get old :D

  10. Emily February 28, 2009

    hope that you start feeling better soon. i hate when i get sinus infections! i get mine at the beginning of the winter around like November and they suck!

    at least you’re able to make a gorgeous photoshop image for the site tho!! as for the boy stuff. don’t worry so much about it. as long as that feeling is still there when you hug you’re probably doing fine! :)

  11. Shellz February 28, 2009

    A lot of people’s blogs are talking about they’re sick. I haven’t been really sick in probably 3 or 4 years, I don’t really get sick too easily. I hope you feel better!

  12. Amanda February 28, 2009

    haha well you see the problem is, it’s actually still summer here XD well, the last day of summer today, based on months. Autumn only “starts” tomorrow – thats why I was so concerned I’ve been sick already, haha.

  13. Amanda February 28, 2009

    @Dakota Dakota Dakota!
    Thanks :)
    it’s a random bunch of photos I took that I’ve put together in different layers… and ooh yes, I love that vintage polaroid camera! <3

  14. Holly March 7, 2009

    Ugh. I know what you mean about the sinus crap. I had that last week too, it was horrible! I hope you feel better soon!


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *